The following article appears in the most recent issue of the Bethany Sun as "Birds and Bs"
Given where we live we get to see lots of interesting birds. It was american coots one year, grebes another, a pair of northern pintails in the dugout, and one year more snow geese than a guy could count. We have a great horned owl that returns to our pine trees to nest every year, a pair of merlins and a number of mallards which do the same. One Sunday morning as I got up to have breakfast.
A pigeon.
It wasn’t that I hadn’t seen a pigeon before – although this one was quite pretty. It was that this one sat pecking in the middle of the driveway. Launching into the air to let us drive by, it flew in a large circle returned to the same spot once we had passed by. It turned out to be a racing pigeon (I won’t bore you with the details of my investigative process). By the time we discovered it perched and pecking among the pebbles of our pathway the race had long been won. If I recall correctly it had been at least a week since the other racers had returned to the comfort of their coops.
Now, I’m no pigeon expert but I understand that sometimes outside forces can cause a pigeon’s internal GPS navigational system to go bonkers. Lost, confused and exhausted our friend had paused to do what (so I’m told) pigeons do in these circumstances. They find a gravel road or driveway and peck small pebbles which somehow aid in their recovery. Once they are strong enough and regain their sense of direction they head for home.
Early in the morning, about five days later, I watched our new friend take off and head in the direction of home…
…that afternoon he returned.
…a day or so later he headed off again and as far as I know, this time, he made it safely home.
(In case you’re wondering how I know it was a “he”… if it had been a “she” it wouldn’t have gotten lost in the first place… according to my wife…)
Have you ever felt like that pigeon? One minute you’re in with the pack (or flock) the next you’re flying solo. One minute you’re on track, the next you’re lost. You had a real shot of winning… yesterday… a week ago… You’ve given up trying to reach the finish line… now you’re just looking for home.
I’ve been there. In fact, this past year was a lot like that for me in many ways.
What do you do when you find yourself there? What do you “peck” at?
For me I turn to the Word.
Now I know what you’re thinking but it ain’t like that… I don’t pile up the commentaries and dig into the “deep” truths of scripture. I don’t do word studies and mull over Greek grammar. I don’t parse or pick apart phrases while ploughing for principles. I simply read the stories.
I peck.
Honestly, sometimes I don’t even read the stories – I just lie back in a comfortable chair, or in my hammock, and think about the stories.
You were perhaps expecting more from the guy who pastored a dozen years and now teaches Spiritual Formation? You were hoping for a method perhaps? A spiritual discipline which would get you through the disorientation? Ten-steps to get on track… Five steps to win… Seven steps to Christ-likeness. Well… I could give you a list but they don’t work for me. I peck.
Do you know what I’ve discovered. I almost hesitate to say this because some of you are going to turn this into some sort of method. You’re going to go back over the article looking for the fine print, reducing a story to a 12-step program. DON’T DO IT!
I memorize Word and sit with it as story. What I’ve found is that when I sit with the stories I discover anew why I’m on this spiritual journey. I rediscover the One I so desperately want to be like and the One I’m trying to reach. …and I discover that I do not have to reach Him… He is with me still.
I discover I am not like that pigeon, lost and alone (though I still feel like it).
When I called the owner of my pigeon-friend he was completely unconcerned. I thought he was going to thank me effusively, rush out and rescue his bird and maybe give me a cash reward or something. But when I called him his response was something like
“…ah yeah… that bird… well, if it’s still there in a couple of weeks give me a call I might come out with some other birds to help coax it into a cage…”
A couple of weeks??? Might???
The stories of scripture affirm that no one needs to call the One I am pursuing and tell Him, “I think I’ve found something that belongs to you.” No one needs to provide Him with directions or offer to call again in a couple of weeks. No, not my Master. My Master sits in the gravel with me… and tells me stories.
Somehow that’s enough for now.
HIDE AND SEEK
I stop
trying to find
what’s not mine
I give up
the chase or race
I fall from the sky
not grace
where
is He?
He is not lost
but then
neither am I
How can I be lost
when the One I seek
has promised never to leave me?
